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Your Daily Dose of Intentional Living – Week 3 Wrap Up

Want to live a more fulfilling and intentional life?  Sometimes we just need some reminders, fresh inspiration, and someone who’s been there and desires the same thing.

This is my 3rd week of broadcasting Your Daily Dose of Intentional Living LIVE this month and I’ve compiled all the videos right here in one place for you.  My goal is to provide helpful and inspirational content and provide simple steps to be more intentional with our time and efforts.

MONDAY MOTIVATION video:
Ever feel like you’re completed overwhelmed, OVER IT, or just ready to have a little less stress in your life?  I share two simple exercises that will help you to create a clean slate every day.  I’d love to hear how these work for you!

TUESDAY TIP video:

In this episode, I discuss ways to overcome holiday stress and drama that inevitably happens each year, and also share some good tips to overcome the winter blues.

Mentioned in this video:
Click here to find the fun and free printable conversation starters.  I’d love to hear back from you how smooth and fun your holiday table conversations go after using these!

WEDNESDAY’S WORD video:

Wednesday word was DISCIPLINE.  If you’re lacking discipline in an area of your life that you really want to change, this is the video for you!  I share five steps that will help you achieve the discipline you need to make the progress you want.

THROWBACK THURSDAY video:

Today were throwing back to the creator of the model T — Henry Ford. Let’s see what Henry can teach us about creating a growth mindset.

Mentioned in this video:
Mindset by Carol Dweck

FRIENDSHIP FRIDAY video:

Learn a super effective way to be a better friend.

Mentioned in this video:
The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
My article from a few years ago on The 5 Love Languages.

Friends, if you know of someone who might find value in what I’ve shared in these videos, don’t be shy–share away!

Did you miss the wrap-up video posts from previous weeks?
Click here to watch week 1 videos.
Click here to watch week 2 videos.

Here’s to being kind human beings.

Much love,

Jill xx

Disclosure: Some of the links (for the books on Amazon) in this post are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.

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Surviving the Holidays Despite Family Drama

Have you noticed that there is often much grunting and groaning going on as people talk about their holiday plans with family?

Now for those millions of you that have a perfect family (or so Facebook tells us), you can just pray for those that experience a bit of family drama over the holidays!  : )

Here’s a sampling of paraphrased statements I’ve heard over the years:

“The last thing I want to do is sit at the table with Uncle Jerry as he gets drunk and starts telling all my mom’s secrets!”

“Why do we have to feel so split?!  We have to go to my parents’ house first and then load everyone up and go to my dad’s house.  Why do we have to stick with a stupid tradition when it’s so hard on our family?!”

“Our family is falling apart.  Why must we get together with our fake smiles on and try and pretend it’s not?!”

“My mother insists in helping me out in the kitchen, but I can’t do ANYTHING right!!  Why do I even bother?!  Oh, yeah, because it’s MY house and MY kitchen!” 

“My grandma will not let up on when I’m going to ‘supply’ her with another great-grandchild!  Seriously, she won’t stop!!!!” 

“With my family, it’s all about who can outdo the other in giving gifts!  I feel like we sit around being greedy and feeding our selfish interests.  It’s sickening!

I’m sure some of you could add a few choice phrases to this list, too

They read kind of funny here, but when it’s happening to you, it’s not so funny, is it?

The holidays should be a wonderful opportunity to gather with those you love, celebrate the reason for gathering, and create sweet memories.

The sad truth is, many families, this time of year, experience stress instead of times of joy.

Friends, we can only control what we can control, and that is: how we react to situations.

Here are four tips to surviving the holidays and actually coming away with some good memories:

Set healthy boundaries.  This is key!  Decide where you will go and how much time you will spend there, and stick with your plan.  Whether you’re attending a holiday party or going to your parent’s house for Christmas dinner, agree on a plan, stick with it, and don’t feel guilty or feel the need to explain the boundaries you have set to anyone else.

Take the high road/Bite your tongue/Pick your battles.  I was going to write about these three separately, but really they go together, don’t they?  I know that when someone says or does something that riles me up, the next words out of my mouth may not be the most gracious and tender, so besides practicing deep breathing and taking the family dog for multiple “therapy walks” during your family gathering, try this:  Anticipate possible “situations” that may arise and spend some time thinking about how you can: 1. Stay away from certain topics (politics and religion to name a couple!), 2. Refrain from commenting on conversations that will only bring about division or get you nowhere, and 3. Strategically move a conversation/situation in a healthy direction.

Extend love and grace.  At any given point, most of us are struggling with something inside that may manifest itself in an ugly way.If you remind yourself that someone may be acting like a jerk because they’re missing a loved one, they’re struggling with an addiction, or they’re unhappy because of their crappy job, it gives you a whole different perspective.  This does not mean you are deeming their behavior as acceptable, but if you can view it in this light, you will be able to extend love and grace in an authentic way, which may turn their behavior around altogether.  Try it!  Even if it doesn’t change anyone’s behavior, you’ll feel better about how you responded.

Remember the things you are most grateful for.  So, if you find yourself sitting at the table with your drunk Uncle Larry spouting off, tune him out and turn to this gratitude practice:  Look around the room and begin compiling an internal list of things you’re grateful for.  Who knows, you may even be able to feel grateful that Uncle Larry didn’t monopolize the ENTIRE evening this year–only part of it.  This may feel like you’re grasping for straws, but trust me, it truly helps.  An attitude of gratitude changes everything!

And last, but not least, if all else fails, become a permanent fixture at the kid’s table and ignore the drama that ensues around you!

Here’s to creating beautiful memories (even if they resemble a page out of the Griswold family photo album) and remembering that we can only control what we can control…our reactions.

As always, I appreciate you spending time with me here today.

If you liked this post, please share with your friends, family, and co-workers.

Jill xx

 

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Overwhelmed by the Holidays?

Tis the season to be…..

Overwhelmed??

Wait a minute.  I thought this was supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year!

Each year I see more and more people running around trying to complete an insanely huge list of things they think they should get done during the holiday season.  It’s important to note that most of these people running around do not have smiles on their faces.

Did you know that holiday gift shopping is up 8% from last year and shoppers around the country say they are planning to spend an average of $861?  That’s a lot of money and who decided that more is more!  The upside this year is that 54% of these shoppers will not be adding to the traffic jams around town because they will be making their purchases online.

Whether you are in full overwhelm mode, are in denial of your state of overwhelm, or it’s just about to set in, here are a few suggestions to make this holiday season a little merrier and bright.

Prioritize.  What is the most important thing about the holiday season to you?  Put aside what you think you should do and decide what is truly important to you.  Is it spending time with family?  Volunteering in the community?  Having the best Christmas light show in town?  Make a list and spend your time on the top two to three items.  Chances are those items that fall to the bottom of the list are the culprits that kick you into overwhelm each year.  Get rid of them and don’t feel guilty about it.

Get Rid of the Guilt.  A lot of the guilt we feel during the holiday season is based on not meeting a list of unrealistic expectations.  Guess what?  When you create the priority list above, you are starting fresh and setting your own realistic expectations.  For example, for years I felt guilty when I didn’t send out Christmas cards.  The problem was that I wanted to personalize each and every one and that would take forever, so instead I didn’t do anything at all.  One year I decided to send a card to anyone I loved that was over the age of 80.  I accomplished my Christmas card task that year.  Granted, I only had to send 5 or 6 cards, but I did it.  The key was taking a task and making it manageable and realistic for me.

Curb the Cookie Cussing!  When you are cursing under your breath while baking the 27th batch of cookies, it may be time to step away from the rolling pin!  If you have committed to making cookies for your 27 closest friends, but hate every minute of it—stop it!  Your friends will still love you, even if you don’t deliver cookies to their doorstep this year.  Don’t want to deprive yourself of the entire baking experience?  Maybe making a batch of cookies with your family on Christmas Eve is more manageable and realistic for you.

Party Like It’s 1999 or Not!  Don’t feel that you have to attend every holiday party.  You may get uninvited in future years, I know I have, but adding 22 parties to your already busy schedule can drag you down.  Question?  Why does everyone and their brother choose to throw a party in December anyway?  I know our houses look pretty with all the decorations, but wouldn’t it be great if groups of friends would put the names of all the months in a hat and draw out their designated party month?  This way we would have a nice party to look forward to each month throughout the year!

Be a Blessing to Others.  There are lots of opportunities in each of our communities to be a blessing to those who are less fortunate or lonely.  Consider helping out at a homeless shelter or food bank, sing carols at a nursing home, visit a home-bound person who doesn’t have family around, or donate a gift for a child that may only receive that one gift.

How are you doing this holiday season?  Are you in the overwhelmed category or have you found a good balance?  Tell us about it in the comment section below.

Wishing you each a very peaceful and happy holiday season filled with love!

Jill xx

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